Posted by simukaas on 2015/07/03 under Uncategorized I’m a 14 year old boy named Simon who’s gay. I live with my family: mother, broher, father. I’m too scared to come out to them. My family fights alot. Mostly because my mom doesn’t agree with my dad. When that happens it messes up my emotion, witch i’m ussualy happy. My family fights everywhere: in the car, on a holiday, at home, at a guest house… I’m done with the family part. Now the gay part. I’m not that angry a bout being gay, I acctually really enjoy it,’cuz I feel different. The hardest problems about being gay for me are : 1.It’s hard to come out to friends… I can tell a stranger instantly that I’m gay to see their reaction or if they agree with that, but to a friend it’s scary,’cuz you might lose the friend. You never know if they believe in something that’s against that or just hates same sex couples… Atleast I have some friends who i came out to and they reacted normaly, some were even happy for me :). 2.I feel like I’m cursed. Not with only bad luck, but with a thing I call ,,Forced true love”. Everytime I see a guy that looks cute, or hot, or attractive to me I instantly fall in love… I don’t want that to happen.’Cuz if anyone gets hurt it’s me, because I’m the one that fell in love and didn’t get an answer, I’m the one that knows I’m in love. And one of the worst parts is that I’m gay but I still fall for girls. No i’m not BI, I can feel it’s wrong when i fall for a girl, but i can’t do anything about it :(… 3. Acctually falling in love with the person i WANT to love. One year ago I had a crush on everyone (at the start of 8 grade), but when time passed I just didn’t get feeling for most of them. And finally at the end of the year I came out to atleast half of my class and the only love i had since is this one guy, who i knew from since i was 7 or so. He’s so cute and i haven’t forgot about him since we met. I even came out to him, but i didn’t mention the part where i’m in love with him (Btw his names Paulius). So one day i desided to sent him a Katy Perry music video – Firework and direcred the part where there’s a gay kiss. And ofcourse I was afraid so I ,,accidentaly” sent it to the wrong person. Then I asked him to not tell anyone and he agreed (as far as i know he didn’t tell no one yet :D). And me, the only-tell-truth b**** I am, afterwards at night sent him a messege that it was acctually for him and thanked him for understanding…. Since I finished 8 grade in a progymnasium i need to transpher schools. I luckuly got in to one. And guess what… HE GOT IN THE SAME ONE.. Listen, I believe in fate :DDD. But, time will show. So yeah this is me, expressing my feeling to who ever read this long ass um… letter? Thanks for sticking with me and my story for now :D.